Our Journey to Adoption, Part 2

I'm picking up where I left off in Part 1, so if you haven't read that, check it out.

Ever since Zoe, our second child, came along, whenever anyone has asked if we plan to have more children, Trevor and I have responded by saying, "Well, we hope to adopt someday."  After the arrival our son Josiah, our response always went something like: "Well, we don't expect to become pregnant again, but we do hope God allows us to grow our family through adoption." This answer had a two-fold motivation.  Firstly, we've felt God drawing us into this adoption journey for years now.  We've always hoped to have a medium/large-sized family, and we've hoped adoption would be part of our family's story. Secondly, Josiah's birth was a very frightening & dangerous experience for both Mom & Baby - one we'd rather not risk again. So, adoption felt like it was down the road, somewhere in our future.  We have good friends who are in the process of adopting from Haiti.  We pray often for them and for the children they will one day bring into their family.  As we've prayed for these kids, we've sometimes found ourselves also praying for "our kids." Saying, "Lord, if there's a child in the world you want to bring into our family, move us and compel us to pursue that child. Protect and watch over this little one. Lead us, guide us, and prepare us to be the parents this child needs."

After we attended the conference, "Together for Adoption," we had many people ask us if we were moving toward adoption.  It's an obvious question.  Our answer for the past year has been, "Well, we're not actively pursuing an adoption.  We're not working with an agency, an attorney, or the foster care system.  We probably will someday.  But in the meantime, if God brings a child into our lives in need of love, stability, and a forever family, we will prayerfully consider if that family might be ours." My aunt was one of the people who asked that question. She works in southern California at a wonderful place called Elizabeth House.  This home is a ministry serving women and children in crises, pregnant women in particular.  Debbie and the staff do amazing work, beautiful work, helping these women overcome tragedy and adversity to love and care for their families. They minister to women in their brokenness, showing them the healing that is found in Christ, and they equip women to be good moms. It's a fabulous ministry - one I can't rave about enough.

Well, on July 19, 2016, Debbie sent a message, asking if we would consider adopting a four-year-old little girl.  The message came in on my phone.  I was driving, so Trevor read the message.  His first response was, "Whoa!  Wait a second.... Did I read that right?"  We were driving to Sioux Falls for a baseball game.  The kids were all taking afternoon naps in the back seat. We both stopped, sat there slack-jawed. Finally, he asked, "How should I respond?"  Neither of us felt like we could just say "No" and dismiss it.  We needed to know more.  Debbie called, and we talked for the rest of our drive.  She told us this little girl's story, most of which we're now choosing to guard rather than share. We know that many people will have many questions.  But now, feeling so protective of J, we want to make sure that the details of her story are kept private for her sake. We will share that J's first mama, unable to parent J any longer, has chosen to make an adoption plan . Debbie told us that J's first mama wants to choose the forever family, saying that she had described the family she imagined for her daughter.  That family sounded a lot like ours.  We prayed before getting out of the car at the baseball game that night, and since then, not a day has gone by that we haven't prayed for J, for her birth family, and for the plan God has for her. Since the very first mention of her, a love has been growing in our hearts - a love that refuses to give up and walk away.


If you feel compelled to help us cover the expenses involved in bringing J home, please visit our "YouCaring: Compassionate Crowdfunding" site.

Our Journey to Adoption, Part 1

It wasn't long after we married that we both felt compelled to pursue adoption. It was 2007. We began to pray and study and learn. The next year we began the international adoption process. We were in the early stages when the country we planned to adopt from closed. Rather than change countries, we felt compelled to wait. We knew at the right time, God would again impress upon our hearts a desire and an urgency for adoption.

 Fast forward to 2015. With three children at home, we began to move toward adoption again. Trevor enrolled in a seminary class about adoption. The focus was three-fold: the theology of our adoption into God's family, God's heart for orphans, and the practical implications of human adoption (how couples can pursue it, how families can succeed in it, and how the church can support it). We read many books together. That semester, a typical evening involved Trevor reading aloud while I folded laundry. We attended a conference called, "Together for Adoption." We were blessed to be on the receiving end of incredible teaching and training for church leaders and adoptive parents. We began to pray more about our role in caring for orphans and once again felt a desire to build our family through adoption.

More to come.... 

But if you'd like to read a general overview of the process we're currently engaged it, you'll find some more information at our "YouCaring: Compassionate Crowdfunding" site.

Reflecting Our Father's Heart

This is the story of our adoption journey.  As you read, we hope you'll have an understanding of what this process has been like for our family, how it has shaped us, and how it has ultimately been orchestrated and sustained by our Heavenly Father in whom we find our true home, our true family, and our true hope.  This is a story about bringing a daughter into an earthly family by adoption, hoping for the joy of her presence in our home. This is about giving one child a home and bringing her spunk and laughter and personality to fill its rooms and our hearts.  But we'd be dishonest if we didn't explain that this process all started when we came to understand our own adoption into Christ's family. This journey really began when we dug deep into God's word and saw his heart for the lonely and the fatherless and came to realize that, as His children, we ought to have this same heart, too. We understand that reflecting the Father's love and compassion for orphans doesn't always mean adoption. And as you read about our journey, maybe you'll find a way to "take up the cause of the fatherless" (Is. 1:17) in your own individual way.  But for us, when confronted with the option to adopt a child into our family or not, we knew that choosing not to would be disobedience on our part. We attribute this to the Holy Spirit's conviction on our hearts and the hand of a sovereign God leading us into His will. Each adoption story is as unique as each family. And we hope to be good stewards of the story he has given to us and the little girl we hope to adopt.

Thanks for reading!